Monthly Archives: March 2018
Journal-Ease
Tuesday, March 11 This has been a terrible morning online. My latest master Kandor isn’t anywhere, nor have I found any of my sisters either last night or this morning. The channel appears to be dead and there are no … Continue reading
I am Crushed
When Karl talks about divorce I am terrified that I will not be able to change his mind, that nothing I say to him will make him stay, I have pushed him too far. So I cry, and plead, and … Continue reading
(Inter)Netted
Rape in the real world is not at all an erotic experience but on IRC it is a metaphor for power exchange, ur-D/s, as stylized as a flower arrangement. It starts off angry and violent but always ends with the … Continue reading
Dog Years on the Internet
When I look back at my first day in that IRC channel, I’m embarrassed at my nativity. I stumble into the supposedly medieval Tavern and type hello all cheerful. Nobody says hello back, which is a little strange. Then, as … Continue reading
Epiphany
In some ways, it’s lucky that I have the ability to find fulfillment in internet sex. Playing online is safer than meeting strangers in a dark alley, I say to myself. Words are a sterile outlet and the potential for … Continue reading
The Thaw
Nothing really changes between Karl and me until 1996, two years later. That’s when I first connect to the internet and discover a whole world of dominance and submission, sadism and masochist, power exchange and slavery. Instantly, all my fantasies … Continue reading
Frigid Is As Frigid Does
In the beginning I am at a loss about why sex leaves me cold, I can only figure that something is messed up in my head to make me indifferent to a man’s touch. Before I ever have sex I … Continue reading