My mother was born on Leap Year Day in 1912

At least that is what she was told

In the orphanage

But nobody ever found my mother’s birth certificate

For proof

Because she was born in a stairwell in a tenement on the

Lower East Side or the Bronx

Or Canarsie and raised in a hotel room

For the next few years

Ignored as the bastard baby of a crazy mother

Until she wound up in one institution

And crazy mom in another.

Years later my mother and father planned a trip to Italy

But my mother could not get a passport without a birth certificate.

In the event that you do not have one,

You can substitute affidavits and school records and notarized forms

Which my father acquired after many hours of research and

Several hundred dollars in bribes

He was glad to pay.

They had a joyful time in Italy

On a tour with other couples, bussed from Rome to Florence.