When I decided to become a lawyer
After decades of scoffing
At bourgeois stuffy boring men
In suits with briefcases
Like my father
I enrolled in law school, conveniently just
Down the road.
My first class was Legal Writing because
You have to write to be a lawyer and
Lawyers have their own bourgeois stuffy boring language
So for my first assignment
I wrote fluently, cascades of fancy words
Whereas accordingly insofar ascertainable approbation and so much more
Wrapped around a meaningless core, all these Latinate
I was proud as a peacock.
I had written like a lawyer
Like my father.
When the professor returned my assignment with comments and corrections
She wrote in red
On the top of page one
This is gibberish.
So that is how I learned
The hard way
How not to write like a lawyer.