[Prologue] I am uncomplicated, my instructions
written in invisible ink also useful for wrinkles
in the dark use a flashlight
[Rule one] tell me I am funny and smart
repeat every half hour
set your alarm
[Rule two] tell me you love me
alternate that with the other stuff
[Rule three] buy me a Mercedes.
I wanted a Mercedes ever since my father
bought one & let me drive him to the hospital
it was a cream puff
I keep this guide in the glovebox of my Mercedes
safe but accessible in case
you get hungry.