She walks in beauty like the fucking night

I said fifty years ago in California

also today when she tumbled in her hospital

bed half-lidded petting invisible

cats — do you believe her hair is still brown —

she will never

own a little house with garden and birds

which is what she wanted

after decades rattling around poor old lady rooms

and now she’s almost gone

I rubbed her back when she cried in childbirth

today I asked want a back rub

she replied how come there are so many cats

in my bed tonight